Last month Tracy took the time to write a series on the impact of adding something she loved back into her days. I didn’t get to do that. Between being away from home for most of the month and the rest of my remaining spare time I had being devoted to decluttering, I just didn’t get to it.
Two years are both a long and a short time. It’s long when you look ahead and think, “Oh, my gosh! I have to wait 2 years for…” or “I’m going to do…for two years!”(Insert something great in the blank spots.) It becomes incredibly short when you look back at the 24 months. A fleeting blink of the eye, it seems.
Looking back it seems just like yesterday I sat down for the first time to paint. Panic! Yup, I felt panic. What was I going to paint? I could hardly remember how! I had started the experiment by saying I was going to paint one whole picture a day and THAT was overwhelming. I hammered out a sad, muddy picture to keep to my word but quickly changed the experiment to painting for an hour a day. That was much more manageable! I had to paint at the kitchen table because I didn’t have a quiet place of my own to paint. It was unnerving to have to struggle with learning how to do that with the family watching. It was unnerving to have to post what I’d done online.
I did it though because I kept telling myself that I couldn’t be the only one struggling with not only taking time for myself but with being a “beginner” at something too. So I shared everything I could.
The rewards I got for doing that were so much more than just learning how to paint all over again or how to take time for myself. I had created a small tribe of women who felt like I did and who were kind enough to compliment my struggles and amateurish paintings.
Some of you became cherished friends, with us from the beginning. One of you literally changed my life at the most personal level. You know who you are. These were things I would never have predicted for myself at the start. I’m overwhelmed with gratitude that you were there with me during my struggles.
My life has changed because I asked myself, “What if…” I’m asking the question again. “What if I made an effort to reach more people?” Who knows what will come of it? I’m asking myself, “What if I make a bigger goal with my painting?” A goal big enough to need its own website! It’s an experiment, we’ll see what happens. I know from having done this that there will be struggles and surprises. Things that I would never have guessed at, and maybe, just maybe, some of what I hope for will come true too.
I wrote my very first post here on The Dao and I think this is my last one. My hope is that you will all join us in the next step of this experiment over at Women Making Changes. But if that is not the next step for you, I wanted to tell you how grateful I am that you shared this time with us. I wanted to tell you not to give up the belief that you are worth spending time on. I wanted to tell you that it’s ok to carve out a tiny corner of your life and fill it with something you love. I leave you with that key. It’s up to you to put it in the lock!
With so much love and gratitude,
PS Now let’s go make some changes for ourselves and the world we live in! I promise you, we can rock our world!